Monday, September 10, 2007

Now This is a Screed

This is why I miss Lileks' dormant screed:

Osama’s back! Or maybe not; this site says the tape freezes in a most peculiar way whenever current events are addressed. Like many, I found the speech a tiresome rote recitation of the usual droning points, and was amused by the Oliver-Stone vision of Western history. It's like listening to a college freshman who considered shoplifting the Howard Zinn book because he didn't want to use his Visa and get on any Enemies List. (In the end he asked Dad for a twenty, and paid cash.) The video would have been more impressive if Osama had shot it at an outdoor cafe in a thriving, beautiful city whose economic, military, and artistic prowess shames the world, but as usual he's probably coming to you from some hole where people have to crap in a bucket. It's like Darth Vader saying "Join me, Luke" from some Tatooine outhouse - after Luke had lopped off his hand.

I can understand how some people who find themselves cohabiting a portion of a Venn diagram with Osama would bristle at the notion that they are on his side, or like him in any way; if he said the sun rose in the East, that doesn’t mean that people who accept celestial mechanics are terrorists. Just because he said that Kennedy was killed by the military-industrial complex and the Iraq war is about oil doesn’t mean it’s not so. Just because he cites Chomsky doesn’t mean Chomsky’s wrong. Just because he chides the Democrats for not pulling out of Iraq doesn’t mean they shouldn’t. Just because he hates Rumsfeld and blames him for everything from Vietnam to the Shah to the unsatisfying Sopranos conclusion doesn’t mean that many of us in the West didn’t think that episode lacked closure. Just because he says the right things and hates the right people doesn’t mean he’s left – er, right. Er, good. He’s irrelevant, because there is no terrorist threat, except for the one we created, which we can solve by leaving, but he’s also extremely relevant inasmuch as we haven’t found him yet, which proves the Administration is incompetent at
protecting us from the threat of terrorism - which is a manufactured bogeyman designed to take away our civil liberties. Is it any coincidence that the tape surfaced just as a court struck down that law about that uh, that thing they were doing? I don’t think so. As I keep saying every time a court strikes down a provision of the Administration’s post 9/11 practices, or a newspaper reveals another element of our secret strategies: we are a hair’s breadth away from a fascist state.


Sadly accurate. Lileks' site says the screed will return in March 2007. Faster, please.