Ukraine's President Viktor Yanukovich has secured a $15 billion bailout from Russia, offering respite for an economy heading ever closer to default but also drawing accusations he has sold his country out to its former Soviet master.
Such a bargain, too! Normally you have to settle for a Moldova for such a low, low price.
What the Hell. Ukraine had a good two-decade run. Who could want more?
John Kerry was unavailable for comment, as he has been too busy effing up our foreign policy over Syria and Iran and possibly discussing global warming with the Vietnamese, or something.