Dear Gloria

[UPDATE 4: Wow, less than a day after my tremendous act of patience and forgiveness, today--31 JUL 13--some stupid law firm calls me to tell me they are calling about Gloria D. and that they are a collection agency. They want me to call them at 866-599-6068. So the name goes back up. Gloria D. has wrongly given me as a credit reference and if I ever find her ...]

[UPDATE 3: It has been a while since I've gotten any calls or mail for this woman, so in the spirit of generosity and I don't want to hear her name again, I'm getting rid of her name on this post.]

It may be time for a credit intervention for someone intertwined in my life, [Name Redacted]. Dearest [Name Redacted] has invested a great deal of confidence in me to provide creditors with an avenue to communicate with [Name Redacted] when she allegedly fails to pay her debts.

I'm of course touched by [Name Redacted]'s faith in me--despite never having met her--and so this post is an effort to pass along yet another urgent message seeking Ms. [Name Redacted]. (She's not affiliated with me! Sorry, my daughter has been watching The Incredibles a lot lately.)

Anyway, [Name Redacted] neglected to provide me with email, mailing, or phone information in order to carry out my contact role that she clearly intends for me to fulfill. So in desperation I am taking to the Internet in the hopes that [Name Redacted] will get this message so she can finally clear up what I am sure is a terrible misunderstanding with another creditor. The letter did say that they could forward this information to a credit reporting agency, and it pains me to contemplate that.

Dearest [Name Redacted], this week I received a letter from EOS, CCA notifying you (through my address) of a "notice of collection placement." Apparently, AT & T Mobility believes you owe them $190.50. I didn't look closely at the address in the large stack of mail I had that day and only noticed the last name on the envelope. I wasn't wearing glasses.

Although in fairness I have good reason to believe that [Name Redacted] intended for me to open the letter given that I know Ms. [Name Redacted] has told another creditor that I am the person who can reach [Name Redacted]. So how could I not open a letter to [Name Redacted] when she is so obviously counting on me to reach her with important information?

But thank goodness I did open it since I didn't have [Name Redacted]'s address to simply forward the letter to her! So [Name Redacted], if you would send me your current contact information (see email at the left) I could directly send mail and phone inquiries your way (and scrub these online references to your name to protect your good credit name, of course). In good conscience and with a sense of duty imposed on me, I cannot let you down in my efforts to pass along information with whatever means are available.

Anyway, [Name Redacted], please use the client reference number 230649668 and the agency account number 6209138 when you call EOS CCA toll free at 1-877-667-6048. The letter says if you don't dispute this within 30 days of May 17 (the date on the letter), they will assume the debt is valid. Since time is of the essence I obviously couldn't wait for you to contact me first.

Oh, and [Name Redacted]? The notice says you can pay by credit card if you so choose. Perhaps that's just amusing to me.

UPDATE: I wonder if this statute applies? On the bright side for [Name Redacted], if so this is still a misdemeanor.

UPDATE: For those student loans I was named as a reference for by [Name Redacted], there could be problems if they fall under federal law. I bet they would considering I get three pages of hits when searching for that statute while limiting the sites to State of Michigan pages.