Imagine a Roman cohort that had failed in combat after fleeing the enemy, lined up, disarmed, and surrounded by loyal cohorts, and told by their leaders that they would face a Washington Decimation as punishment. Imagine the horror of those surviving 500 legionnaires being told their fate by the budget battle-hardened centurion:
Men, you disgust me! You fled in the face of the Sequesterian swordsmen! You all know the punishment. We've no choice but to decimate the ranks.
The men of the shamed cohort shifted about and mumbled in fear, as they began to see what was going to happen.
The centurion exploded at the break down of discipline.
Silence in the ranks! Any man who steps out of formation will be cut down like the dogs you are!
That's better.
Now this is going to be a Washington Decimation, and not a Roman Decimation that you are perhaps used to. This cohort is currently 500 strong. As you know, a full-strength cohort has 600. So we were going to add 100 new replacements to this unit.
But not now. Oh no. Not now. We will punish you for your cowardice in battle that almost led to the evisceration of Rome's finest food inspection facilities and the deaths of our most dedicated police and teachers!
So rather than give you 100 replacement legionnaires, we shall decimate the planned increase to your authorized full strength! We were going to cut your planned increase by the usual 10% and give you only 90 new soldiers.
But we decided that was too Draconian. Nobody wants to emulate the Greeks, eh? So we shall slash your planned reinforcement by the bowel-loosening amount of 2.3%! We shall only give you 98 new soldiers! And then another one late in the next fiscal year, of course.
The troops started to look up and glance at each other, suddenly aware that the Washington Decimation wasn't quite so bad as the traditional kind that they were used to, when cuts were literally cuts to the throats of those who failed in battle.
But the brightest ones in the ranks were wise enough to cry out, "No, my Lords! Not that! How will we get by! We won't even be able to send a trireme to face the Persians if this keeps up!"
Quiet, dogs! You are dismissed to your barracks--with pay, of course--to contemplate your failures. Now begone!
And the centurion just grinned. A cruel grin forged in many a budget battle fought in Rome. And he whispered to himself, "That'll teach 'em to run in battle."
And it did indeed teach them. And it taught the loyal troops who had fought and stood their ground despite the casualties they endured. Oh yes, there were many lessons learned that terrible day.
