Monday, December 19, 2011

Doltzkrieg

The two-hour season's end episode of Terra Nova is on tonight.

I'll be watching. Despite my misgivings, I like the series. Shoot, there isn't even any eye candy to keep me coming back (What? Summer Glau isn't available?). But the stories are entertaining and the characters run from interesting and sympathetic to at least not critically annoying (coughVcough).

Oh, don't get me wrong. The military aspects of the show are just embarrassing. From base construction, to field operations and patrolling, to technology, the Terra Novan defense forces are just beyond mocking. The Sixer opponents are just as much of a joke for not being able to overrun the sorry blokes defending Terra Nova.

Tonight's episode will feature the Sixer offensive from the future against the Terra Novans. So there will be a large battle with explosions and special effects.

What there won't be are tactics or any indication that any character (or anyone involved in the show's production) has had even a moment's experience with the military.

Truly, tonight's episode will go down as the greatest clash between military mediocrities since Italy and France met on the field of battle in 1940. Although it will require suspension of disbelief, with thanks to Hillary Clinton for the phrase, I'll be watching.

UPDATE: It was entertaining. And I cringed as I watched the rock-pounding stupidity of the Terra Novan defense line at the time travel gate, anticipating the true awfulness of the battle royale that I was about to witness. Let me just say the concepts of cover and dispersal should be reviewed before the series continues.

But after the suicide bomber (what, they couldn't shove a backpack with a timer through instead?) damaged the gate, the show skipped over the battle to having the evil corporations in charge of Terra Nova with the commander out in the bush commanding the new resistance. I nearly cried when the perimeter stake of their camp wobbled at the lightest touch. Clearly it was decorative rather than functional. It reminded me of my first term introductory American history course as a freshman as I sat in my seat eagerly awaited my esteemed University of Michigan professor's take on World War II. This is college, gosh darn it! I'm going to get insights here!

He said we won and should consult the reading material for details, then rolled into the post-war era. After all these years, I'm simply grateful he said "we" won.

So at least the writers and producers recognized their limitations. The story was entertaining. And there was a good hungry dinosaur chase scene.