Zombie Stalking

The undead stalk me.

Over the years I know I've written about a woman who shares my last name who told lenders I was her son (as one collector told me--maybe two?) who would always know her location. She did not pay a number of debts, if the calls and letters are any indication. So starting over 15 years ago I started getting calls from debt collectors looking for her. They were polite when they called because I did not owe money.

But repeated explanations to them did not stop the calls. So on advice of an attorney I simply stopped responding so they wouldn't think they had a good number and pass it on when they give up and sell the account to another collector. Eventually I wondered if I'd have to outlive her. Given that at one point I found out she was only about 12 or so years older than me, that seemed like slim hope since women live longer.

Perhaps I should have pursued legal action against her. But I had a life to live and the occasional letter and letting my machine take those calls was not much worse than all the other telemarketers and scams that added to my mail box and answering machine every day.

And at some level I guess I figured I didn't know what personal demons she endured. Maybe she was being punished enough by her life of evading debt collectors.

But she did finally die last year. To my (mostly) unashamed relief. I knew that she passed away because the state of Michigan came after me for a post-death payment to her until I got them to understand I didn't even know her let alone have responsibility for her finances.

That exchange was all so bizarre. On the phone the otherwise polite and sympathetic employee could not access the file because I did not--of course--have her social security number! So I had to send them a copy of the letter they sent to me along with my letter explaining their mistake! Arggghhh! But at least they quickly corrected their records and even sent a letter confirming that, at my request.

I thought I was finally free.

Sadly, I've started getting polite calls from a debt collector again. I know I still don't owe anybody any money. The politeness alone tells me that. I assume it is about dear Gloria again. I hope she is rotting in Hell. Or that God gives her withering glares of disapproval whenever He sees her, at least.