I am building schools for girls in Islamic countries and studying the Qur’an …
Well, not really. Madonna just thinks she should study different religions. Now it's Islam's turn. Perhaps she'll try Catholicism next.
Her whining about how unpopular being a noncomformist makes you seems rather silly given how she built a fortune on the popularity built on that persona.
But one thing she'll learn about her new course of study is assured. Mark Steyn notes that Madonna urges people to be daring, which "in her book" is how to live life. That could be a problem:
Okay. I opened Madonna’s book. It was the Sex book. She’s naked sprawled over a wall with her bottom in the air, and some enthusiastic dogs down below. For her new Muslim friends, the dogs may be a problem.
Yeah a lot of things about Madonna will be a problem for Islamsits who don't think studying the Koran is something you do on a lark just to be daring.
Will we see Madonna's songs re-released in Islamist-friendly terms?
List of songs by Madonna (courtesty of Songfacts) and new Islamist-themed titles.
Madonna - 4 Minutes --> 4 Minutes Until the IED Blows
Madonna - American Life --> American Death
Madonna - B-Day Song --> M(artyr)-Day Song
Madonna - Bad Girl --> Girls are Bad
Madonna - Beat Goes On --> The Beatings Go On
Madonna - Beautiful Killer --> [No Change]
Madonna - Bedtime Story --> Deadtime Story
Madonna - Best Friend --> Best Rend
Madonna - Borderline --> Borderline Personality Disorder
Madonna - Burning Up --> [No Change]
Madonna - Candy Store --> [I got nothing]
Madonna - Celebration --> 9/11 Celebration
Madonna - Cherish --> Perish
Madonna - Crazy For You --> Crazy For Everyone
Madonna - Dance Tonight --> Dance Tonight and Get a Lashing
Madonna - Dear Jessie --> Dear Osama
Madonna - Deeper and Deeper --> Reaper and Bleeped!--whirrrrrr
Madonna - Devil Wouldn't Recognize You --> America Wouldn't Recognize You
Madonna - Die Another Day --> Die Right Now
Madonna - Don't Tell Me --> Don't Insult My Religion
Madonna - Dress You Up --> Cover You Up
Madonna - Everybody --> Everybody Submits
Madonna - Express Yourself --> Express Yourself and Get a Lashing
Madonna - Falling Free --> Falling from the Twin Towers
Madonna - Future Lovers --> Future Bombers
Madonna - Gang Bang --> [No Change]
Madonna - Get Together --> Blow Apart
Madonna - Girl Gone Wild --> Girl Gone Wild on Got a Lashing
Madonna - Give it 2 Me --> Take it 4 Allah
Madonna - Give Me All Your Luvin' --> Turn the Anger Up to 11
Madonna - Holiday --> Ramadan
Madonna - Hung Up --> Strung Up By the Neck
Madonna - I Don't Give A -->
Madonna - I Fu--ed Up --> I Blew Up (When My IED Went Off)
Madonna - I Love New York --> I Hate New York
Madonna - I'll Remember --> I'll make Stuff Up
Madonna - I'm a Sinner --> You're a Sinner
Madonna - I'm Addicted --> I'm a Dick
Madonna - Incredible --> Inshallah!
Madonna - Into The Groove --> Into the Grave
Madonna - Justify My Love --> Justify My Jihad
Madonna - La Isla Bonita --> [Not even close to having something]
Madonna - Like A Prayer --> [No Change]
Madonna - Like A Virgin --> Like 72 Virgins
Madonna - Live To Tell --> Live to Submit
Madonna - Love Spent --> Ammo Spent
Madonna - Lucky Star --> Lucky Car Bomb
Madonna - Masterpiece --> Masterpiece is Haram
Madonna - Material Girl --> Ummahterial Girl
Madonna - Miles Away --> Bombs Away!
Madonna - Mother and Father --> Mother and Father are Involuntary Martyrs
Madonna - Music --> Music is Haram
Madonna - Nothing Really Matters --> Nothing Rarely Splatters
Madonna - Oh, Father --> [I got nothing]
Madonna - One More Chance --> One More Lance
Madonna - Open Your Heart --> Rip Open Your Heart
Madonna - Papa Don't Preach --> Papa Don't Honor Kill
Madonna - Promise To Try --> Promise to Die
Madonna - Rain --> Pain
Madonna - Ray Of Light --> Blast of Light
Madonna - Rescue Me --> [No Change]
Madonna - Revolver --> AK-47
Madonna - She's Not Me --> She's Not That Into Me
Madonna - Some Girls --> Scum Girls
Madonna - Spanish Lessons --> Spanish Taught Lessons on M-11
Madonna - Substitute For Love --> Substitute for Ammonium Nitrate
Madonna - Superstar --> [I got nothing]
Madonna - Take A Bow --> Take a Bomb
Madonna - The Power Of Goodbye --> The Power of Box Cutters
Madonna - This Used To Be My Playground --> This Crater Used To Be Your Playground
Madonna - True Blue --> True Green
Madonna - Turn Up the Radio --> Turn Up the Radio and Get a Lashing
Madonna - Vogue --> [I got nothing]
Madonna - Voices --> Voices In My Head
Madonna - What It Feels Like For A Girl --> What It Feels Like For A Girl In A Burqa
Madonna - Who's That Girl --> Is That A Girl in the Burqa
Madonna - You'll See --> You'll Die
I'm not sure if you are allowed to dance to any of them, of course.
But hey, will see how this new daring exploration works out for Madonna.
