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Saturday, May 06, 2006

Director's Cut

Zarqawi released a video showing him firing off a captured American light machine gun and issuing his usual boasts.

But what he didn't count on was our forces capturing the out-takes and blooper reel:

But as the previously unseen video was shown, Lynch mocked al-Zarqawi, suggesting his weapon jammed and he was unable to fix it.

"It's supposed to be automatic fire, he's shooting single shots. Something is wrong with his machine gun, he looks down, can't figure out, calls his friend to come unblock the stoppage and get the weapon firing again," Lynch said.

"This piece you all see as he walks away, he's wearing his black uniform and his New Balance tennis shoes as he moves to this white pickup. And, his close associates around him ... do things like grab the hot barrel of the machine gun and burn themselves," the military spokesman added.


Heh. All it is missing is the little kid accidentally swinging a baseball bat into Zarqawi's groin and al Qaeda in Iraq could submit it to America's Funniest Home Videos.

Oh, and rumors that the out-take reel shows Zarqawi coming out of a Tigris swamp with a good friend holding a pheasant and shotgun are just mean and totally unfounded.

Seriously, though, it is interesting that Zarqawi and his closest companions have less weapons experience than our clerk-typists. Mighty warriors, indeed.