Last year I bought a tuxedo. I've rented tuxedos perhaps three times in my life--including my wedding. So my purchase wasn't exactly something to save me money on rentals. I don't, to put it kindly, have a tuxedo sort of social life. I mean, not yet anyway.
But there it was in the store--from shoes and socks to the bow tie. And on sale. So I bought it. I joked that I was going to be the "guy with a tuxedo." That's how women would come to think of me--the guy who can grab the tuxedo out of the closet at a moment's notice and hit the shaken martini-set social whirl. I'm single, I figured, so it could be "my thing" that sets me apart from other lesser men. (And yes, yes, I mean other than my intellect, wit, and good looks.)
At worst, if I wear the tux only three times I get back my investment. That's not too much to assume, is it?
So I own a tuxedo. I'm a "tuxedo-owning guy." It still sits in my closet ready to go. I don't know when exactly I will get a chance to put it on, but one never knows. I like to think of it as an expression of confidence in the future. A future where women swoon and men feel inadequate in my presence.
A tuxedo-wearing future in which I will look spectacular.
About Me
- Brian J. Dunn
- I live and write in Ann Arbor, Michigan. University of Michigan AB and MA from Eastern Michigan University. One term in the Michigan Army National Guard. Former American history instructor and retired nonpartisan research analyst. I write on Blogger and Substack. Various military and private journals have published my occasional articles on military subjects. See "My Published Works" on the TDR web version or under the mobile version drop-down menu for citations and links.
